Text 1: Kate Bornstein,
Hello, Cruel World (2006)
Alternative to Suicide #69: GO ON A SERIAL SUICIDE SPREE
Laugh at your own funeral, dance on your own grave, and then skip off to live a whole new life. Don’t kill yourself! Kill off the part of you that badly needs to die. Of course you are simply you, but you are also many versions of you that you create to deal with the world: You are the you that you are with your friends. You are the you that you are with a bully. You are the you that you are with your parents, your boss and your lover(s). Some of the you’s that you’ve created are like Frankenstein’s monster. You tried, but you fucked up. Other you’s might be really creepy. They embody selfish, mean, or self-destructive parts of you, rather than the loving parts of who you are. Maybe you’re feeling ashamed or guilty about that particular you. Well, kill that you off! It’s as easy as one-two-three!
ONE: Make a list of the qualities that describe who that unwanted part of you is, what that part of you does, and the values that part of you hangs on to. Give that part of you a name.
TWO:Figure out the sweetest way it could die.
THREE: Kill it the way it’s always wanted to die.